Life: Best Of...

Who I Am (straight from the personals)

I play musical instruments and have a slight desire to raise bees for honey (perhaps related?).

I don't have a unique or original thought in my head, and make dull conformity the guiding principle of my life.

I consider myself unique and special, like a snowflake, and have an important destiny predestined for me, which entitles me to act in a selfish and occasionally petty manner but it's all for the greater good, you know, because of that snowflake/destiny I have.

I can ask monks for directions. This trait seems to be rare among men so i think this is good product differentiation.

Picture a young, half-asian Larry David with an absurd affinity for Tequila that works for a mega corporate conglomerate...jesus ...putting that in words was unbelievably therapeutic.

I've been in New York for a few years now, but I spent the majority of my life in the South. I point that out because I do miss the ability to call up a friend and just hang out without making an appointment a week in advance.

I have a to-read stack that includes Chekhov, Rushdie, and Saul Bellow -- yet I have a mysterious addiction to Us Weekly.

I'm so ugly that they push my face into dough to make animal cookies. I'm so ugly I make onions cry. I'm so ugly that my mom used to take me to work with her so that she didn't have to kiss me goodbye.

Those who don't know me very well would say I'm underspoken, but those who do know me, would probably say I border on obnoxious.

I was really really funny in grade six, I might have peaked there.

I am easily manipulated, will work for food, and for five minutes once a year I can be the life of the party.

I might be incapable of a long term emotional commitment. Or is this the wrong place to mention that?

I'm not sure I have any conception of what honest communication would be like with another human being, although I can imagine it being frightening, so we'll want to do it with a Plexiglas partition in between us.

Punk rocker turned science teacher.